Sunday, May 15, 2016

Lots of changes

This week has been a difficult one for me ( Kirsten). I got released from my calling as 1st counselor in the Relief Society Presidency and then when they came to ask me about a new calling it was for the Gospel Doctrine teacher.  I will give you a little background.
Over the last months I have felt like my scripture study was good, I love reading the Book of Mormon for the most part and usually get up, sometimes walk Kona, then get ready and give myself about 10-15 minutes for scriptures. I always feel like I should spend more time reading  but I feel compelled to get off to work. So in the back of my mind, I knew I needed to do more study but hadn't prioritized actually doing it. Then I read a mini book this week called 'One Drop at a time" by M. Russell Ballard. In it I read a line that really struck me. He stated " the doctrine and gospel of Christ is the only way to obtain eternal life. Only when our testimony transcends what is in our mind and burrows deep into our heart will our motivation to love and to serve become like unto the Savior's. This deeply affected my thinking because my mind is very strong and I think I just can't give up my pride and let  the spirit guide me in every way. Then they asked me to be the teacher and I knew it was the Lord's way of making me do what I already knew I needed to do. I also read this section of scripture which seemed to speak more directly to me at the very time I needed to hear it than any other scripture ever has.
Alma 32 which talks about being compelled to be humble, then in vs 21- faith is not a perfect knowledge, then Alma 34:31-31 Harden not your heart, now is the time to prepare ,  VS 33, do not procrastinate vs 38 contend  no more with the Holy Ghost, but receive it, and humble yourself. Vs 40 have patience.  I knew I had to accept after this but I still found it very difficult to face. I had a rough week with Rob giving me a hard time about having the missionaries and I felt so very alone in my church responsibilities which kept making me find every excuse still to turn down the calling. I think that Satan knows my insecurities and made it very difficult for me with little support from Rob. Anyhow, I still made a million excuses when I accepted but they persisted and here I am. I pray that I can find ways to facilitate a discussion each week that will lift and strengthen.
   Oddly, I had also recently told myself that I would willing serve whenever asked. I have observed this quality in others and wanted to emulate it. This was a real tester of that commitment. I feel incredibly inadequate, and you, my family, know more than anyone that I am the least qualified. I will however try, each week to prepare.
   I got a lot done in the yard, the rain has returned. I went to Beaverton this Sunday and spent the day with Mom and Melinda and Eric & Paige and Robbie. Hailey was super sick, throwing up, so that was sad, but we had a nice dinner and Eric is treating me so nicely. I love him. I am so thankful for forgiveness. I am so excited for Courtney to come in a couple weeks.  I planted the garden  tomatoes and flowers in the yard. I forgot to order the hardware for a case for Rob and he was very forgiving.
Everything else is rolling along,

Sunday, May 8, 2016

Grandma Olsen and I eating at RedLobster for her Mother's Day Lunch before she left for Eric's.

weekly update...May 10th, 2016

My mom ( Grandma Olsen) finished her stay with us yesterday. We were lucky to have her for 3 weeks and it was really quite delightful. She said how secure and comfortable she felt here and I think she really enjoyed her stay. We saw the tulip farm, shopped, watched movies like the 100 foot journey and Jane Eyre and she helped the office. She will be missed. I am blessed to have such a great mother.
Rob made awesome rolls this week, he has perfected his recipe. He fixed the lawn mower and we have the yard looking better all the time. He bought me beautiful flowers and chocolates for Mothers day and I am so grateful for him.
Courtney is doing well. She has a job interview on Monday for a car dealership secretary and paid her first car payment. She played baseball this week in Rexburg and had a great time. She went down last weekend to support Ashley's skating and is just a sweet daughter whom I am so very grateful for. She is still dating Max and seems happy.
Ashley finished out her finals and got straight A's! So proud of her efforts! She was able to schedule her class and get funding for the summer and is happy to have it all worked out. She called this week to tell us how scary it was to get locked in the freezer at the Aggie Ice Cream shop, we laughed but I am glad she is ok. She is still dating Daniel and enjoying her ward.
Andrew called me for mothers day and it was so good to see and talk. He is keeping very busy too. He is attempting to get on at Shandong University as a teacher and won't book his flight until he figures that out. He wants to teach more adult students and feels with his degree and 2 yrs of experience teaching , he has good chances of getting hired on. He says he could make a lot of money tutoring also. He said he and Ru are together again, and he is definitely coming home for late August.
Life is going along well, we are slowly realizing we may never be so lucky to have our children raise their kids near us, but hope to be involved somehow someday. The house seems kind of empty today, missing the days of everyone here.
Church was good, new member of our bishopric, and I got released today along with the whole presidency. It was a rare moment in time to be as involved in the members of the ward as I was, but I hope it will not end. I really want to remember all that Nancy and Natalie taught me about friend shipping and fellowshipping and service.
I am so very glad that relations with Eric are better, it makes me thankful for forgiveness and kindness. I do love them and love him.
Hoping this week is good weather, feeling badly for the people of Fort McMurray, this week fires ravaged the town. Thankful for the stuff I have and especially for people who are so good to me.